From the Middle East to the Grand Canyon.

At the beginning of 2020, I deployed to the Middle East for the first time ever. Needless to say it was a unique experience: the atmosphere, the people, culture and of course COVID-19 played a huge part in how I experienced things. The stresses of deployment life were specifically unique due to the pandemic but our team made due with what we had. During the early phase of the time downrange, I stumbled across a few YouTube channels about photography and videography and it really reignited my passion for the art form. I knew after spending all the time in the desert I would want a break from it all and just wanted a nice winter getaway. Fast forward a few months and I became severely depressed to the point where I was actually offered the chance to return home early but I declined. I continued out my deployment and in doing so, dedicated all my time to learning more about photography, cameras, the basic techniques, the advanced techniques, lighting, editing, equipment to use, equipment to not use, composition tips, all of it. Of course some of it I didn’t retain but the majority I did. A few months before we returned home, I thought what I would do when I got back. I thought back to my original plan to go on a long trip, but then remembered I wouldn’t have anyone to go with now. But then I thought…why punish myself any further? I had already endured a summer in the Middle East, in the midst of a Global Pandemic, confined to a box. Why shouldn’t I enjoy myself? And so I started planning.

Now as an introvert, what I had planned for myself went against every fiber and gut feeling in my body. I thought of every little thing that could go wrong and tried to account for it. I thought about what the weather “COULD” be like in the various locations that time of year. What “MIGHT” happen if my car broke down. What would I do if I got robbed by a miniature panda riding a sea turtle. Crazy stuff. And against everything, I continued to plan and follow through with it. I would be the first time I traveled this far alone, the first time heading this far west alone, the first time visiting these locations and I would be all by myself. It was then I decided to visit Lake Tahoe. A reward to myself for surviving the desert and the pandemic for 9 long months. But I also planned, not only for it to be a vacation, but a way to test myself and my abilities as a photographer; I decided this would be a photo-trip! 14 days. 5 locations. All by myself. The Grand Canyon was first on my list. Then Sedona, AZ. Las Vegas, NV. Lake Tahoe, NV (…and California a lil). And lastly Page, AZ. It wasn’t until I started making deposits on AirBNBs, hotel rooms, car reservations, that it all really kicked in that this was happening. For once in what seemed like a LONG time, I was excited about something. Happy to be doing something for me! Regardless of pasts heartbreaks and disappointments, I was happy to have the chance to travel and visit these locations with a goal in mind; become a better photographer.

Fast forward a few months and I’m back stateside. I somehow managed to get my hands on only my second camera but first mirrorless camera, within 6 months of it being released! The Canon EOS R5! And for anyone wondering, this thing is a BEAST. Coming from a Canon EOS Rebel T6 to the latest and greatest mirrorless camera from Canon was a bit of an insane jump to most people, but to me it was an investment in myself. I knew I was taking photography seriously and wanted to “future-proof” myself from being tempted to by the next new camera on the market because I already had a beastly, workhorse of a camera. I still recall packing for the trip. Sitting in my room, getting all my clothes together, making checklists, going back and forth, back and forth ensuring I had everything I need. Checking my gear, cleaning my gear, formatting SD cards, dumping photos and footage on my hard drive, all of it. It was actually happening and the Introvert in me was not happy but I knew I had to do this. Not only because if I didn’t, I’d lose about $1500 worth of deposits, but because this was the first step in chasing a dream of mine. I remember packing up my rental, a 2021 Toyota Rav4, packing out the trunk with all my gear except one bag. My camera bag. That rode shotgun with me the whole trip. I remember mounting my GoPro Hero 9 to the windshield just in case I wanted to get a quick shot of sometime. It was 3:00 in the afternoon (1500 for the Military folks) and I pulled away from my apartment knowing the next destination I would end up was looking out onto the Grand Canyon for the first time.

I drove throughout the whole night, getting through Altus, OK to Texas, taking what I could only remember as some super sketchy backroads. I remember as the sun set, the moon came out on this beautiful clear night sky and it lit up the roads like I could have even imagined. I made pitstop in Amarillo, TX just for gas. Masked up, ran inside, grabbed a case of Red Bulls and carried on. Driving through the night, blasting Giveon, Daniel Caesar, Brent Faiyaz, just to name a few, singing and putting on a full blown concert for myself because at various, random points throughout the drive I got jolts of excitement. I thought to myself “I’m going to the f***ing Grand Canyon!!!” and “I’m about to see the Grand Canyon”. You always hear people say its the little things in life. This wasn’t one of them. This was a huge deal and I acted accordingly. The next pitstop was at a Love’s truck stop right outside the New Mexico border. Masked up, ran inside, grabbed some shot glasses, magnets and re-supplied my hand sanitizer. From there the next thing I remember was realizing again just how bright the moon was that night and I kept thinking to myself that this was amazing. The weather was amazing, the drive (even though at night) was amazing, I felt amazing for the first time in a long time. I looked out the window and I could see the silhouettes of mountains. The roads went from flat and straight to elevated and winding. I glanced down at my phone’s GPS to see where I was, Albuquerque was just ahead of me. I had never seen Albuquerque before and had no idea what to expect. As I came around a bend in the road I could start to see city lights and then I came to a clearing and then I saw it, the city of Albuquerque, NM lit up the night sky. To some it might not have seen like much, but to actually look down and see the entire city, beaming, glowing, illuminating everywhere…it was if the city had it’s own pulse. As though, even with a pandemic raging across the US and the rest of the World, Albuquerque, the city itself, was alive and well. I was in awe, even coming from the city of Atlanta, I had never seen anything like this. As I drove through, I almost slowed down to a point just to take it all in a bask in the late night glory of the place and once I made it through, I couldn’t but look in my rear view and think….“DAMNIT!!! Why didn’t I get a picture of that!?!” But I was trying to make a deadline now, get to the Grand Canyon by sunrise.

The rest of the trip was just as amazing. I surprisingly never got bored once throughout the whole thing or felt really sleeping. The thought of finally getting able to see the Grand Canyon (paired with about 15 12oz Red Bulls, 3 bags of gummy bears and music ranging from Cardi B to My Chemical Romance to Yo Yo Ma) really kept me awake. I can still remember crossing the border into Arizona, starting to see signs for the Grand Canyon and finally coming off the highway, taking the off ramp and turning right down through what I later found out to be the Kaibab National Forest. About a 20-30 minute drive through what was essentially a death trap highway lit only by the moon and my headlights. But everything really began to set in. I started getting serious, getting into my “photo-mode” and thinking about what was coming. I finally made it to Tusayan, AZ which was essentially a small little tourist town built to house those coming to visit the canyon. I looked off to my right and saw the Grand Hotel at the Grand Canyon, my hotel that I booked and thought about how great it would be to get some rest after a 14 hour drive from Oklahoma and then about how I suddenly wasn’t that tired. It was about 4:50 in the morning (a couple of hours before PT for the Military folks) and I got to the gate of the park, grabbed a ticket, paid my $35 or so for the day and found the parking lot right next to the main visitors certain. I unlocked my phone to check and see what time sunrise was; no service! It was oddly one of the best feelings ever. I was isolated, cut off from all distractions and able to focus on the task at hand and that was getting my shot of the sunrise at the Grand Canyon. Good thing the nervous introvert in me checked the weather before I left and saw that sunrise was at about 6:50 am. I took a quick nap, woke up and found there were only a few other cars around where I had parked. Perfect, the park wasn’t busy. I stepped out the car and instantly caught a cramp! Not today Satan! I made it all this way and I’m getting this shot. I walk it off, throw my boots on, grabbed my camera bag and after getting lost trying to find one of the biggest holes in the earth, I walked up on Mather Point, looked out and there I was. Everything seemed to stop for a second. It was freezing cold but I couldn’t feel it. As I looked out I was in complete disbelief; that I had made it, that I followed through with this insane plan and that I was finally standing at the rim of the Grand Canyon. I took a deep breath, savored the moment, unclipped my Canon R5 from my camera clip and started taking pictures. This was it. This is what I had been planning for. Over 9 months ago, I was stuck in the Middle East, in 120 degree heat, locked down on a base during the beginning of a Global Pandemic and now…standing at the rim of one of the most beautiful sights I had ever seen. After about a hour walking the path, back and forth, I decided to stop for the morning and check out the rest of the park and Tusayan, get some food and head to my next location. But before leaving (and after getting a selfie of course) I took one more moment to look out onto the vastness of the canyon and to just realize where I was. I’ll spare you the agonizing details but I definitely had a moment. For once in my life, I felt like I had accomplished something worth while and even though there had been plenty of moments before that one that I will never forget; jumping out of airplanes in North Carolina, winning soccer tournaments with my dad as my coach, the memories I made in Korea, the promotions, the awards, the medals, the achievements, all of that seemed insignificant compared to this moment. I had survived my deployment, one of the worst heartbreaks I have experienced, the daily stress of my job and all of that lead my to this one moment, standing there in front of the Grand Canyon. It was everything I hoped it would be.